Latest posts with tag: "the baby"

  • Dad of Dojima

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    My daughter is literally two weeks old, I put her in a bassinet next to me, it is a word I just learned, it's a basket on wheels that you put your fresh baby in because they are fragile and important and about as mobile as a zucchini. All I want, for the love of god, is to get an hour or so of time that is unpunctuated with shocking emissions of any sort, from the ass, mouth, or butt.

    That's because I have decided that babies are boring, but setting my virtual baseball team to double-speed autopilot and watching their statistics simulate an inconsequential game so that I might win a modicum of also virtual and Very Inconsequential experience points for the baseball players (also not real) over and over again is exciting? Comfortable, at least.

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    These are early mornings, ones that seem more distant in history now than it's easy to explain, days removed from a human being blasting out of my life partner, as we are now left to our own devices—here is a person who can't do anything and who will require your absolute care every three hours At The Least, and okay you can load her up in your car and take her home like a sack of groceries now, ha ha good luck, the speed limit is 70. I cannot envision a life that exists for me outside of the present moment, one free from the confines of tending to the the world's weakest bonfire.

    Unfortunately I also just got a copy of Yakuza 6. It is playable on the video game system that you can't take away from the TV.